June   2008   

Let me start by sharing an experience I had at the Human Performance Institute in Florida last month.

I was invited to participate in an HPI 3-day retreat, led by none other than HPI co-founder, CEO and best-selling author Dr. Jim Loehr. (He's a pretty big Kahuna in my world.)

But let me tell you, it was also a lot of work.

There is nowhere to hide in the HPI compound. You go there to see yourself as you truly are - to get real about how you are currently performing, and to stretch your own limits.

It is an awesome opportunity to face the truth, and I went in ready to take it on. They do your blood-work, test your body fat, and most revealing of all, you go through what's called an Energy Management 360, where your colleagues, family, friends, and mentors essentially report out on how they see you showing up physically, mentally and emotionally. Deep breaths all around.

Now as you know, I'm pretty passionate about walking the talk, but I'm far from perfect.  I know that I'll always have areas that I can work on, but I have to admit that there were a few areas where I thought I was sneaking by. My rational was, if nobody's calling me on my little imperfections, I can just work on them any old time. What I discovered in the 360 is that people have been noticing, and most importantly, people I care about were noticing. That was all I needed to know.

Thanks to the feedback, I'm fired up to stretch myself further. I'm not headed for perfection here, but it is energizing to see where I can improve and to know what I need to do to be more of the man I aim to be. That's all it's about.

My point in sharing this with you, is to encourage you to seek out feedback for your own personal and professional growth.

Look at feedback as an opportunity, not as something you need to hide from. If you are curious about the HPI program, I'd love to share more of my experience with you. Call me or email me to talk it through.

Chris 604.209.4988

P. S. If my story has inspired you to seek a little feedback right now, read my article on eliciting feedback.

If you were to FULLY live your life, what is the first change you would start to make?

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MANAGE YOUR PEOPLE: Face Conflict Head On

Conflict is a constant in management, so get used to it. 

Last month we started to look at Patrick Lenconi's 5 Dysfunctions of a Team model. My article Build From Trust tackled the first dysfunction that comes up in the model - absence of trust.

The second dysfunction is fear of conflict.

According to Lenconi, fear of conflict inhibits teams from engaging in "unfiltered, passionate debate about key issues."

He identifies two problems that come up when teams fear conflict, "First, stifling conflict actually increases the likelihood of destructive, back channel sniping. Second, it leads to sub-optimal decision-making because the team is not benefiting from the true ideas and perspectives of its members." 

Top 5 things managers need to know about conflict:

1. People have different thresholds for conflict. Some people grow up in a household where every conversation involves yelling - it's a natural part of their communication. Other people want to run if someone casually questions their lunch choice.
   
   It is important that you are aware of how the people on your team experience conflict. Are people hiding? Is anyone intentionally provoking others? Are people accidentally throwing others off course because they have different tolerances for conflict?
   
   
2. You need to know your own threshhold for conflict. Once you are honest with yourself about how you feel about conflict, you can start building your capacity to deal with it.
   
   If you are adverse to conflict of any kind, you are going to avoid conversations that you need to have. If on the other hand, you have a much higher threshold than the folks on your team, you can use your confidence in the area to help others see that conflict isn't a bad thing.
   
   Like any other good management behaviour, the more you model a healthy approach to conflict, the more you inspire those around you to do the same.
   
   
3. Conflict is a lot less scary when it is out on the table. A lot of people keep things bottled up because they are afraid of what might happen if they start to release. Or they think the conflict is going to be much bigger than it really is.
   
   9 times out of 10, when my clients report back to me after confronting conflict head on, they say "I can't believe how well that went!"  They are always shocked and excited by the possibilities that open up as soon as the dialogue is opened up. And it almost always turns out that the thing they were avoiding looked a lot smaller when they just put it out on the table.
   
   
4. It is incredibly difficult, to do great work when you are navigating a minefield age-old unresolved issues.
   
   People often avoid conflict because they fear that after getting the issue out, there will be some kind of fall-out to deal with.
   
   Let me tell you, the fall-out from avoiding conflict is much worse. Everyone's productivity and morale declines overtime when conflicts get buried. Instead of having 20 minutes of discomfort, some people will blink their eyes and realize they've suffered 20 years of anguish. And what's worse? Their suffering wasn't noble - in fact they have very little to show for it.
   
   
5. Dealing with conflict is part of your job. So if you struggle with it, it is something you are going to have to learn to confront.

FYI:The #1 reason people pick up the phone and ask for my help is because there is a conflict in their environment that they can't seem to negotiate. Conflict issues are common, and very coachable, so call me if there's something I can help you tackle.

Related articles on the Blog:

A Quick Introduction to the 5 Dysfunctions of a Team

New Workshop: Working through the 5 Dysfunctions of a Team 

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 If You Feel It Say It 

“I just wanted to  say thank you again for doing such a terrific job of facilitating our two day team building sessions.

The feedback from everyone has been very positive.

I think we made huge progress in bringing this team together.”
 
Karen Foss
President
Canada Wide Media

Who Is This Guy?

MANAGE YOUR ENERGY: Size Matters 

When it comes to meal portions, size really does matter.

There is a certain amount of food that your body needs, and can efficiently use, at any given meal. And you need to know what that is to be able perform at your peak.

Both undereating (skipping meals) and overeating plays havoc with your body's blood sugar. When you don't eat enough, you throw your body into survival mode and it starts storing energy (and fat) to protect your organs. If you overeat, your body tries to rescue itself with insulin production. The extra glucose (blood sugars from all types of food) that pulsees through your system will not only get stored as fat, but it can make you tired, grumpy, and slow to connect the dots.

Oddly enough, HPI researchers discovered that you can actually use your hands to determine what portion size is right for you.

They suggest that you divide your dinner plate up like the peace sign. And fill it with 2 handfuls of grains, 2 handfuls of veggies, and 1 handful of protein. (FYI: The size of your palm is roughly the amount of meat your body can reasonably deal with at one sitting.) 

It is a great system, you never go anywhere without your hands. So where ever you are, you have a visual guide as to how much food your body needs. No scales, no charts, no counting - you just need to look at your hand.

Bigger people (like basket ball pros) have bigger hands, and their bodies can use bigger portions. Makes sense right?

So my challenge to you this month is to try to eat meal portions based on your hand-size. If at the end of the meal you still feel hungry take a minute to check in with yourself before reaching for the bread and cheese. Are you actually still hungry? Or are you just less full than you are used to feeling?

I follow the hand-sized portion system and I just met with a lot of athletes and executives who do the same at HPI headquarters. None of us are starving. Nor are we the type to need a nap after a meal.

Having said that, I have been known to indulge in a 10 or even 12 oz steak from time to time, mmm mmm. It's OK to occasionally eat, and enjoy, a little more of something than your body needs. Just be conscious that your body will react to that decision. And now that you know, the decision is yours to make.

Related articles on the Blog:

Why Portion Size Matters: Human Performance Institute article

For more on the role of nutrition in energy managment you'll also want to read my articles about:

Healthy Snacking

and Breakfast

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